How to Be More Effective: Tips for Extroverts
In a recent comment, Cary remarked, “what I’d really like to see is productivity/interaction tips aimed at extroverts. I get a little fed up with so much advice being aimed at introverts as if extroverts don’t have any behaviors that can hinder them.” This is a good point. I think the reason that so many articles address introversion is because North American culture is so rewarding of extraverted-type behaviors.
But just because one is extraverted does not mean that they have good social skills. Actually, extraversion can actually sometimes get in the way of social graces because extraverts tend to think out loud, sharing information faster than they are able to censor. With that in mind, here are some tips for using those natural talents and making up for the quick tongue.
Interruption Fix
Don’t interrupt; easier said than done, huh? Stop yourself and apologize as soon as you realize you’ve done it, even if you are mid-sentence. When you and another start talking at the same time, insist they share their thoughts first. Realize that every time you cut someone off, you are preventing the flow of new ideas.
Be a Boundary Spanner
Leverage your propensity to socialize into a career and organizational advantage. Establish relationships with colleagues outside of your department, function, geographical location, business sector, or industry. Things often come up in casual conversation that can help break down organizational silos or bring new life to stalled projects. Be generous with connecting people within your network.
Quick Tips
- Listen. When others are talking, listen patiently, and pay attention to nonverbal and potential hidden meanings.
- Pause yourself. Ask if you have answered the question or check for understanding. Are people listening or simply being polite?
- Be concise. You may be long-winded with sharing experiences and giving examples. If you cannot keep it short, be sure to summarize.
- Ask for an opinion. It is likely that everyone is familiar with your stance on a subject. Allow others to share theirs.
- Create stimuli. If the office is too quiet, play some music to help you work. Use headphones to be considerate to nearby introverts.
About Eva Rykrsmith
Eva Rykrsmith is an organizational psychology practitioner. Her passion lies in bringing a psychology perspective to the business world, with the mission of creating a high-performance environment. Follow her @EvaRykr.
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Anita Bruzzese is a syndicated columnist for Gannett/USA Today on workplace issues and the author of “45 Things You Do That Drive Your Boss Crazy.” She has been on the Today show, and quoted in publications such as O, The Oprah Magazine, Glamour, Self.com and BusinessWeek.com. Her website, 45things.com, is listed on the Forbes top 100 websites for women.
Author and speaker Wendy Komac is a long-time turnaround specialist who has helped save companies by focusing on changing under performers to exceptional workers. She is the author of I Work with Crabby Crappy People, a humorous and highly informative book about achieving happiness and success.
Alexandra Levit’s goal is to help people find meaningful jobs - quickly and simply - and to succeed beyond measure once they get there. Follow her @alevit.
Eva Rykrsmith is an organizational psychology practitioner. Her passion lies in bringing a psychology perspective to the business world, with the mission of creating a high-performance environment. Follow her @EvaRykr.
- alexandralevit:
Just welcoming your expertise to the blog, Wendy. Given that 80% of change initiatives fail, we can... - alexandralevit:
Hi, R – I have two Homelanders too. I personally believe that the college market is going to... - rwilcox:
An interesting entry, although I disagree with your conclusions about salary. Here’s why: I have a... - RDS:
This is a fantastic list. Another good is 8 ways to keep your boss happy. http://www.inc.com/geoffrey... - Dush Ramachandran:
Thanks Eva. I’m glad you liked the article.
Anonymous Reply:
March 20th, 2012 at 8:08 pm
I can’t stand repetition unless it’s intential and consistent, like in a *good* lecture — then it’s helpful because I can dial back my attention receptors and relax, knowing that I’ll hear what’s important enough times not to have to focus on trying to remember it or worry about missing it if I’m not paying attention once or twice.
It’s only a problem when the person repeating is *incoherent* or unaware that they’re repeating or they think I’m arrogant (and a dummy– because I “couldn’t possibly” have understood them the first time). It’s really just because they think they’re communicating more effectively simply by repeating. They don’t understand that it’s much like speaking louder in the exact same foreign language to someone who has already indicated that they don’t and won’t understand, or yelling at a mute who’s already indicated they’re not deaf.
The real kicker is when they continue to expect extroverted-gauge “feedback” and “body language” when they continue to monologue on something they already said 5 times or are spilling a torrent of what you know are irrelevancies only to get to the point 10 minutes later. I feel like, if they want my energy and attention, they better darn well have the courtesy to expend some of their own and think about what they’re saying before or while they say it and say it in a clear and concise manner: I’m not going to be the only one paddling this boat!
But then, outside of learning formal public speaking, I’ll bet many extroverts never have to learn that *good* communication involves *skills* that *earn* others’ engagement and that attention and positive feedback are not a birthright…
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